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After one of the meetings, a woman came up to me and said, "I have to talk to you about my boyfriend problems." We sat down, and she began telling me her troubles. I don't want pain in my life." I said, "That's right, you don't want love in your life." You see, there is no such thing as "painless love." The closer we come to somebody, the greater potential there is for pain. But our society has taken what God has said about love, sex and intimacy and changed it into simply emotions and feelings.After a few moments, she made this statement: "I am now taking steps never to get hurt again." I said to her, "In other words, you are taking steps never to love again." She had thought I misunderstood, so she continued. I would estimate that you (and around 100 percent of the population) would say you have been hurt in a relationship before. In order to camouflage the pain, a lot of us give people what I call the "double-sign." We say to a person, "Look, I want you to come closer to me. God describes love in great detail in the Bible, especially in the Book of First Corinthians, chapter 13.

This is where the intimacy we are looking for is satisfied.The Bible says about Jesus: "That as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of God, even to those that believe on His name" (John ). God's word tells us, "He who believes in the Son (Jesus Christ) has eternal life, but he who does not obey the Son shall not see life, but the wrath of God abides on him" (John ). After we place our faith and dependence on Him, He takes up residence within our lives and we have intimacy with Him.What God wants for us is to have life, not only for today, but for eternity. His forgiveness is there to cleanse us from the deepest sin, the deepest self-centeredness, the deepest problem or struggle we ever had or will have.We read in the Bible, "For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son that whosoever believes in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life" (John ).When we turn to God and accept His forgiveness, then we begin to experience His love.All you have is two self-centered people seeking self-satisfaction.

The elements of genuine love and intimacy cannot be obtained "instantly," and you find yourself in an unbalanced state, searching for harmony.

Marshall Hodge wrote a book called In it he says, "We long for moments of expressions of love, closeness and tenderness, but frequently, at the critical point, we often draw back. We are afraid of love." Later in the same book Hodge states, "The closer you come to somebody, the greater potential there is for pain." It is the fear of pain that often drives us away from finding true intimacy. But that same wall which keeps people out, keeps us stuck inside. Loneliness sets in and true intimacy and love become impossible.

I was giving a series of lectures at a university in southern Illinois. Love is more than emotions, and it is much more than a good feeling.

Can you imagine a relationship with this kind of love? As God, He is alive today and wants to put His love in your heart.

God simply tells us that His forgiveness and love is ours for the asking. But if we refuse the gift, we are the ones who cut ourselves off from finding true fulfillment, true intimacy and true purpose in life. All we have to do is respond in faith and commitment. Once you accept Him, you will be amazed at what He can do in your life and in your relationships.

You'll notice that this kind of love is "other-person" focused. God, who knows you, who knows everything about you, loves you perfectly.

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